Tuesday, May 17, 2022
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Gun Meme of the Day: What Did The Five Fingers Say To The Face Edition

Let me tell you something. I had to decline my invitation to the Academy Awards. And I believe a Yellowstone Marathon interfered with my watching on television. I had something similar happen to my wife and I. It wasn’t in Hollywood. It was in the local IGA. On a Sunday afternoon. They were not busy. Three or four checkout lanes of 12 open. No waiting. We were checking out. I had placed all our items on the conveyor and passed the cart to Mary. From her to the bag boy. Mary was prepared to write the check when a young man entered the store. He began toward the registers as a short cut. Who hasn’t? Except he made a bee line for our lane. As he approached he began to loudly announce, ” ‘scuse me! ‘scuse me! Coming through!” My wife pressed herself against the counter to allow him to pass. My blood boiled. I know I shouldn’t have done it. I was still standing at the end of the conveyor. I had not made eye contact, but I was watching with my peripheral vision. I don’t think he thought Mary and I were together. As he drew alongside I forearmed him across the throat. (I didn’t use the elbow. He didn’t need an ambulance ride. Just a lesson.) After he, and half the candy rack, hit the floor he looked up and yelled, “Yo’ man! What’s your problem!?” We now had everyone’s attention. I leaned over a little and said, “I don’t have problem. But, now you do. I will give you one chance to walk away from me. One.” Him, “That’s cool.” He scrambled to his feet an disappeared. To their credit the cashier never stopped doing their jobs. When it was over Mary handed the young woman a check. She looked at me and said, “I’m so glad you did that. He acts that way everywhere he goes.” The bag boy was going to take our groceries to our car (remember those days)? I told him I had it. He said, “You did the right thing, man.” I said, “Sorry about the mess.” Candy bars were everywhere. He smiled and said, “No problem.” Point is, if you don’t learn manners at your parents knee, someone else is going to teach you later.

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